You Just had a Baby, it's OK....

Well it has been forever since I blogged. But I'm back at it....kind of. I guess a better description would be that I'm getting back at it! I'll give a quick update and then get down to business!

Since I last blogged and exercised, I had a beautiful baby girl! She came in September weighing in at 8lbs 14 oz and 20 1/2 inches long! And since she was born via C-Section, I had to wait 6 whole weeks to start exercising. I did do what I was able to get a way with- including long walks through the halls while I was in the hospital and short walks when I got home. I was so ready to start some real work. but I knew better than to over do it; so I behaved! I should also note that during this pregnancy I only gained 34lbs!! My first two were 85 and 65, so this was very exciting for me. And even more exciting was the fact that at my two week check up I had lost all but 5lbs! This was extremely encouraging to me! Also encouraging was the fact that I was fitting into some of my prepregnancy clothes...but not others (this was extremely discouraging though and I din't understand at all!) All of this combined, made me extremely eager to get to the gym!

My plan was to hit the gym precisely on my 6 week mark. However, if any of you have ever had a newborn baby, you know that plans don't always go as planned. And the night before, I was up feeding baby all night long....I think it was 4 times that night and usually we only got up twice. Sleep deprivation kept me in bed sleeping when baby slept. I was able to go the next day though. And it felt SOOO good! I also had my great friend Tiffany get me some measurements.

November 1, 2011 - January 12, 2011(last time I measured)
Chest: 41 1/2 - 39
Stomach: 43 - 38
Hips: 47 1/2 - 44 1/4
Right thigh: 28 1/2 - 27
Left thigh: 27 1/2 - 27 1/2

Ok, let's talk numbers. The only one that really doesn't bother me is the chest. I mean, who doesn't want to be a little bustier!?! Funny story...right after high school I was doing a breast exam and freaked out a little bit because I thought I felt a lump. So I made an appointment with the doctor to get it checked out. After looking me over, the doctor kindly told me that I was so small I was feeling ligaments!! WOW!! So I'll take a bigger bust, even if it is only because they are full of milk! LOL!!

Alright, back to my numbers. I was really encouraged and discouraged at the same time at how rapid the pounds came off after I delivered. I just didn't understand why I could only fit into few of my non maternity items. And after seeing my numbers I have to remind myself that I did just have a baby so while the pounds came off, all of the inches did not. And I have to remind myself of this often. So I am still wearing my maternity jeans and nursing tops, and some maternity tops (the smaller ones aren't too big...well they really are; so I only wear them if I'm not leaving the house.)

After getting to go to the gym 3 times, I got a cold. I haven't been for about 2 weeks now, but I am finally about over it. And I am anxious for next week to get here so I can start back up. But...I do have my pilates machine my sweet husband bought me, that I might just get out if I can get some things cleaned up this morning. Wish me luck on my new journey!! I have a lot to do! :)

This is Going to be Really Hard!!

I had convinced myself early in this pregnancy that I wasn't going to gain any weight. But when I realized how unrealistic that was- especially since I had gained so much with my first two. So I decided that 15-20 lbs. would be okay.

I actually really struggled with it when I was first pregnant. I was very sick- horribly nauseated only vomiting when I had avoided it so long that I would just explode! And then the next two days were horrible. I was first prescribed Zofran because it doesn't make you drowsy. But that did absolutely NOTHING! So then I got some Phenergan and it didn't do anything either. By this point, I thought I would never make it through this pregnancy. I was so nauseated, I could hardly even get out of bed. And I wouldn't eat or drink much of anything. I think that part of it was because I was so nauseated, but a big part of me was terrified to eat. Because if I eat, then I will gain weight. I know it is crazy and probably irrational. But it went on for about a month and a half. Then my doctor had me start rotating medicines, so I was taking phenergan or zofran every 3 hours. It helped a little. Mostly at first, it just took the edge off so I could function as a person and get out of bed. Now, I am actually feeling a little better. I still have horrible days, but it seems to be getting better. (which it NEVER did with my first 2)

I even felt good enough today to go to the gym. I had a good workout, although I did feel a little light headed. I didn't push hard like I had been doing, just went at a nice brisk pace, never letting my heart rate get above 132.

The worst part though, was when I weighed myself. I knew I shouldn't have done it. But I was silly and thought I could handle it. Boy was I wrong. When saw that I had gained 6lbs. I about freaked out right there. I know I am pregnant and on average, I should have gained about that much by now. But I really haven't eaten much in the last 3 months. But then on the other side, I have just laid around doing nothing. But it is very hard for me to accept.

I thought that I could see my weight gain so that I could blog about it, but now I'm not so sure. I don't know that I am that strong. I will have to do what I did last time and that is to not look at the scale at all. I did that with my second baby and I gained 20 lbs less. My husband looked, but I never did. I will have to do that again this time.

I am going to try really hard tho, to keep going to the gym like I did today. I'm a little shaky and light headed still. But I think I'm just dehydrated. So here's to hopin' that I don't gain a lot of weight over the next 6 months and that I stay healthy and active!!

Successes and New Challenges

So it has been a really long time since I have posted anything. But it was for good reason- I am pregnant!!! Yay! In May it would have been 3 years since we started trying! So we are very happy.

It has been a very bittersweet happiness as I have been so incredibly sick. At first I thought I had caught my brother's cold- I was stuffy, had lots of nasal drainage, upset stomach. All very common with a cold, but also with pregnancy.

I remember the night I found out. My husband was at work and my kiddos were in bed. I spent the evening cleaning like crazy and even shampooed our carpets. I was a day late. I didn't think I was pregnant since I had stopped my fertility medicine 2 months before and according to the ovulation test, I did not ovulate. I decided to just take a test to get it over with. (then I could start my provera to get me to start a period.) To my complete surprise, the test said Positive!! I was so excited!! I wanted to wait to tell my husband- I wanted to do something cute like make him pink and blue cupcakes- but if you know me, you know I can't keep a secret like that for long!! So I called him at work and told him!! And I took another test the next morning to confirm. And it was Positive too!!

And here I am almost 2 months later (I was 4 weeks along when I found out) and about to start my second trimester. Getting here has felt like forever. The nausea and vomiting has been so horrible that I have to take phenergen and zofran every three hours- alternating of course. Exercising has always been in the back of my mind and something I hope to get to start again. But thus far, it has been a NO WAY!!

I actually had a time set to go last week, but a foul smell from the refrigerator (everything stinks to me!!) knocked me out for most of the day. It was horrible! I even had to leave the room when a friend took the lid off the chocolate chocolate chip cookies!! Anyway, I was going to go, but that did me in. And the rest of the week wasn't much better either. :(

I will save this for a later blog, but this has been a really scary and emotional time for me. I have been on quite a roller coaster. I am absolutely terrified of gaining weight! But I will talk about that later!!

I am Still Alive

I have not forgotten about my wonderful blog....or losing weight....or body mass for that matter. It just happens to be that customary to this wonderful season- I have been sick as a dog!! Complete with a sore throat, runny & stuffy nose, vomiting, light headed, dizzy, you name it and I've felt it in the last month and a half. It hasn't been TOO horrible, just enough to keep me out of the gym. But tis the season, and spring seems to be on us, so I am hoping that in the next couple of weeks, I will have my strength back and the stuffiness will be gone so I can breathe again!!

But I really just wanted to let everyone know I am still alive and haven't forgotten my goals!!!

Pushing Through

Well, it's been a rough couple of days! I have felt "under the weather" since we left my mom's. BOO!! I don't know if it's a cold, sinus infection, or something else. But man, it's driving me crazy! By the end of the night I have had a sore, hoarse throat. And it's no fun!

But on the bright side, I have been pushing through and still going to the gym. Not as much or as intense, but I have still been going! Last week I only made it once I was so sick. But this week, I have been going every other day and tomorrow is my next work out. I am really excited! Toady I have felt pretty good. I wasn't sleeping well, so I was so tired last week and most of this week. But today was the first time I haven't been like a walking zombie and I haven't gotten a sore throat yet, so I am hoping it has left me for good!

Oh, and I am happy to report that some of the aches and pains I felt doing different exercises made my back sore, but yesterday I realized it didn't hurt anymore! I am really happy to be building my muscles- especially in my back! I'm still not seeing results the way I'd like, but slowly I am making progress in many different areas! Now that it's starting, I hope it will accelerate!!

Thanks to all my wonderfully supportive friends and family who have kept me motivated and encouraged me! It has really meant the world to me!!

Coming to Terms

I think I have some things I have to come to terms with. Last night I was trying on some new work out shirts I got. I flexed my tummy muscles and NOT to my surprise, they are pretty hard!! They always have been! (I used to have killer abs!) It's just that there is a layer...or two...maybe even three of fat now. Really it's not much though. If you poke my tummy, it's only like a 1/2 inch or less. But my stomach is still huge. And I always think I look pregnant.

So last night, I was showing my husband how firm my abs are. But then I was really upset about how my stomach looks. I just don't understand. And he said something that really stuck out to me. I don't remember his exact words, but he talked about a mama pooch. Some people have theirs lower, but for now, mine is pretty much right in the middle and a little high. I think I will always have this pooch.

I remember years ago when I was a teenager. I was the youngest of 6. Then my parents remarried, and I got some younger step siblings. I was so terrified for my mom to have any more babies. I don't know what it was, but I did not want her to have any more kids. When I was a teenager, she was probably pretty close to being 50. But I always wondered if she was pregnant- because of the shape of her stomach. That was one thing of hers that I did not want to get. But I think I actually did. And I guess I am going to have to come to terms with it. I probably won't ever have a flat stomach again no matter how hard I work...I don't know. I'm not completely ruling that out. But I do know that I will probably always have a mama pooch....and if that is what I have to pay for my precious babies, then I can be okay with that- as long as I always do everything I can not to add to it!!

My challenge for anyone reading this is to see if you have any of those kind of things playing against you. And please share with me!! I would love to hear from everyone and anyone!! This blog is really helping me come to accept my body for what it is and love it! And where it is a learning process and is taking time and inevitably I have set backs and falter, but each day I get a little closer!

New...ish results are in!

Well, as I have said I have been pretty discouraged. And TERRIFIED to get measured again. I decided that it's time again. So I had my husband measure me. Now the only thing is we don't exactly know if we were measuring in the exact same spot so I can't say how accurate my results are. They are ok. Just ok. Kind of sad actually. It's been 51 days since my first measurements. (that actually makes me feel a lot better though. I thought it had been like 3 months. But it's only about 2.) Well anyway, Here they are!! and in () is the difference between months

Left Side Right Side
Arms: 12 (-1/2) 12 1/2 (0)
Thighs: 27 (+1/2) 27 (0)
Knees: 16 1/2 (-1/2) 16 1/2 (0)
Calves:14 1/2 (-1/4) 14 1/2 (-1/2)
Bust: 39 (+1)
Belly: 38(0)
Waist: 39 (-1 1/2)
Hips: 44 1/4 (0)

So they aren't too bad, but when I think of all the work I'm doing, I can't help but feel a little frusterated. I was really hoping my thighs, waist, and hips would be smaller too. But then, I am supposed to be starting a period in a few days, So I am really hoping that I am just a little puffier than usual. we'll see. I will keep working hard and now that I have gotten onto a healthier diet than I was in November, I hope the results will start to get better!!